38 Comments
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Andrea Lathrop's avatar

Woah - this is amazing, James. Thank you for putting this down and sharing it with us. The definition of love is really powerful and something I will take with me.

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James Bailey's avatar

Thank you Andrea - wasn't that definition profound? I thought the same thing as you when I came across it. Take good care.

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Claty Austrie's avatar

I am just balling James, that was beautiful!

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Kyla Gebeau's avatar

This is so beautiful. Thank you for sharing. Hits home hard.

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James Bailey's avatar

Thank you Kyla. I appreciate it. My dad was a hero to me and is still very much alive inside my heart.

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Rich Duncombe's avatar

Thank you, James. I saved this post for the right moment, and I am so glad I did. Simply brilliant is the essence of all things and your father found his source and expanded it in all directions. There is no limit to the impact of his presence and your sharing through this medium is a perfect example. I wish you and your family a lovely New Year.

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Amba Gale's avatar

"Brilliant" is the perfect word in every way. Thank you, thank you, thank you, for offering your heart through your extraordinary use of language, and the heart of your grandpa.

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James Bailey's avatar

HI Amba, Thank you for your wholehearted response. I'm grateful for your brilliance as well!

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Rob Tourtelot's avatar

What a beautiful tribute, James. So glad to have read this.

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James Bailey's avatar

Thank you Rob. I appreciate you telling me.

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Karena's avatar

No words. Yet. Just bawling. Good tears.

This - THIS - explains you. And reestablishes my faith in humanity.

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James Bailey's avatar

Karena - I'm happy that it moved you, and that Grandpa Tom is still influencing us. I'm grateful for you. Thank you.

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Rick Lewis's avatar

An extraordinary tribute to an extraordinary person, who has clearly passed a vivid and bright light forward to you. What an overflow of blessing from Granpa Tom, through you, and now to your daughters. It makes me wonder what Grandpa Tom's Source was? Where did he get this from? Likely another person I imagine. I absolutely loved the comment about finding God horizontally through relationships to others. And the story about engaging with the embezzler . . . priceless.

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James Bailey's avatar

Rick, thank you, And your question is a great one. My father was from a VERY small town - Emmetsburg, in Iowa. And his father died of heart disease when he was a teen ager. So, in his words, and also from my experience, his mother was a profound influence on him, as was his aunts and uncles in the small town. Very community centric - as was my dad who was service oriented toward others and his community.

As you might have caught in my replies to others, I wrote this last year in Cohort 9 and was trying to move it from one Substack (that I was going to use to write to my daughters) to OnMoneyandMeaning. Despite the boxes I checked in the process to just publish it to the website - it sent an email to everyone. That was an accident, but based on how it has moved people, I left to now think it must not have been an accident. :)

By the way, embezzler...priceless, nice turn of phrase. :)

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Rick Lewis's avatar

clearly this was meant to be re-shared.

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Charlie Bleecker's avatar

James, why are you always making me cry?? A loving testament to your father and your relationship with him. This makes me want to do and be better.

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James Bailey's avatar

Thank you Charlie. I made a mistake of cross publishing this when I thought I was moving it. And with your reply back along with several others, I’m glad I made the mistake. Let’s do and be better together 😁

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Kirk Sanders's avatar

Love hearing stories about these types of people and how they so effortlessly (it only seems) connect with others. My father-in-law who recently passed was just like this with anyone. By contrast, I have to fight my own tendency to withdraw from people. Despite my shyness, we both connected so well, thanks to him. Great message and person to emulate. Thanks James!

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James Bailey's avatar

Thanks Kirk. What you point out is so lovely when we notice it in people - that they connect so effortlessly. When I hold the perspective that God dwells in all of us, as us, it helps the introvert in me lean into others and tap into their souls. When I do that, I feels effortless - occasionally. :). I would have loved to have met Julie’s dad. Oh wait, I have experienced him through her, and you. ❤️

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Rich Duncombe's avatar

This is such a brilliant honoring of his legacy and your love. Thank you for sharing with such clarity compassion.

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James Bailey's avatar

Rich, thank you so much. I appreciate you and love you.

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Haley Brengartner's avatar

I cried the first time and the second time too. I have never thought about relationships compounding until I read this. I think that is a very beautiful way to think about the precious time we share with others. Thank you for sharing - this was a 'brilliantly' refreshing read.

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James Bailey's avatar

Haley - I’m grateful for your contribution to me over the past several weeks, and for drawing my soul out further through your feedback to me on this letter. #thankful #appreciative.

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James Bailey's avatar

Anthony, your response moves me deeply. Love begetting love, begetting love, tracing all the way to Him, as you express. I’m honored to be participating in the chain. Love is the lesson, life is the school.

I wrote this a year ago and mistakenly republished it while trying to move it from a Substack (for my daughters) that isn’t active right now, to the web page of my current one. I hadn’t intended to send to everyone since probably 100 of my subscribers had seen it. But I messed up.

Turns out my mistake perhaps wasn’t a mistake, based on how deeply it has moved people, and the emails I’ve gotten, even from those receiving it a second time.

Even though my dad is gone, our relationship continues to deepen. I have conversations with him all the time. I go on walks sometimes, like the one I reference at the end of the piece, and ask him to speak to me, and I just clear my mind and listen for what he has to say. It’s amazing what he has to share.

Anthony, thank you again for your presence in my life. 🙏

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James Bailey's avatar

Hi Everyone - My apologies - I thought I was moving this piece from a second Substack to another and inadvertently re-sent it.

VERY SORRY for sending it twice!

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Joe's avatar

No worries, James. Resending this is an absolute gift, particularly during this family-centered time of year. Thanks for the regift (you don’t hear that very often!). Beautifully written, with a love and admiration for your dad that is, hmmm…shimmering with a glorious intensity.

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James Bailey's avatar

Joe-thank you. Turns out the unintentional regift has moved a number of people - for which I’m moved. Long live Grandpa Tom 😀

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Camilo Moreno-Salamanca's avatar

James, I'm so glad you resurfaced this. What a gem. This was brilliant. I may have teared up while reading this at a cafe. And I'm so glad my eyes are glistening.

Thank you for sharing this beautiful piece.

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James Bailey's avatar

Hi Camilo, I was embarrassed that I cross published this while thinking I was simply moving it and not republishing. But now I’m glad! I’m glad it moved you. And I’m grateful you took time to let me know. 🙏

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Camilo Moreno-Salamanca's avatar

Here is to happy mistakes!

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Scott Curtis's avatar

Thanks, James. Truly beautiful. I feel enriched by sharing in this. This writing is BRILLIANT!

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